Happy Valentine’s Day. If your not tired of seeing red, white and pink by now, you haven’t been outside or online much today.
Keeping my Valentine’s vigor alive, I decided to wait until last minute to buy my valentine a card. It’s OK though – I seem to work well under pressure. I didn’t panic at all while I sprinted down the sidewalk, darted in front of traffic and knocked over two people to get to Service Pharmacy to find a good Valentine’s Day card before they were gone. Work well under pressure, indeed.
Actually picking out a good Valentine’s Day card on the other hand… well, that’s different. Over the years, I’ve learned that picking out the perfect card is an integral part of Valentine’s Day – it’s like guessing which wire to cut in order to disable a ticking time bomb. If I get the wrong card, I might as well not go home at all. I would think it wouldn’t be too difficult, since it seems that so many Valentine’s Day cards say the same thing in different words, but I still can’t seem to escape the risk of grabbing the wrong one.
The trick is to narrow down the options to just a few: Do I want the Snoopy and Woodstock card? Do I want the card with the cheap fart joke that leaves a slight feeling or remorse for having read it? Or, do I want the card that says “You are my everything…Love you so much….Blah…Happy Valentine’s Day?” Right away, I knew that one of those cards is just silliness and wasn’t going to work at all in my favor, so I put it back, which left me with two – the mushy-gushy sentimental one and the one with the fart joke. After another ten minutes of deliberation, I went with the lovey-dovey card. Bomb, deactivated – and with plenty of the day left to spare. I look forward to doing it again next year.