A rock and a hard place


Jessica Lewis

I hate hearing people bash working mothers or stay at home mothers. It seems like no matter which way you choose to go, someone is going to have something negative to say about it.

There’s been a lot of discussion on the forum lately about what mothers “should” do, and I just couldn’t let this one go without throwing in my two cents.

As the mother of a one year old child, I know all about the anxiety and guilt that goes along with choosing to work or choosing to stay home. There’s no question that your child is the most important thing, but it’s hard to know if it would benefit them more for you to stay at home nurturing them and caring for them, or if it would be better to get out of the house, communicate with other adults so you’re not so crazy, and find a way to help pay for the numerous costs that go along with raising a child.

Spending time with your child is a blessing. I know I enjoy every moment I spend with mine, even when he’s pulling the freshly folded clothes back out of the laundry basket and stomping on them, but I chose to go to work. On the days I’m feeling the most guilty, I wonder if I made the right decision.

But I know that if I had stayed home with my adorable baby boy I would feel the same guilt whenever I bought something nice for myself or when the bank account started slipping lower or especially every month when it was time to pay those student loans.

In developmental psych, they show you numerous studies and reports that show absolutely no benefit from either lifestyle. The real difference lies in how you spend the quality time that you have with your children. So instead of arguing about which is better, lets just leave it at that.