Real people love “Single-Wide”
There are a lot of great local festivals these days. It seems like there’s one every weekend.
Although, I don’t think there’s anything going on this Friday and Saturday.
That got me thinking; if I had to keep the streak alive, what kind of event would I bring to Norwich?
So I’ve come up with a festival idea for the future. It’ll probably never get off the ground, but it’s fun anyway…
“Chenango Single-Wide Showdown 2008: The biggest, nastiest trailer rally this side of Hot Springs, Ark. Folks who like the calm and quiet of their Trailer Park need not apply!”
Trailers of all kinds – from rotten bottoms to high tankers – would be towed in from far and wide. With the promise of music, food and no cops, Norwich would be smothered with propane-toting Landmarines.
Here’s some possible testimonials from satisfied attendees:
“I was at the Rolling Septic Review last year in Tulsa, and I’ve got to say, the Chenango Single-Wide is the rowdiest, most care-free weekend I’ve spent since getting paroled. The “trailer Jenga” was worth the price of admission alone. Those people know how to run a rally.” – Cherry Stem, Hobbs, New Mexico.
“I’ve never seen so many crab-grass patches get laid down in my life, and I’ve been at this a longtime.” – Sally “Brown” McStain, Montpelier, Vermont.
“We got married, had our reception and went on our Honeymoon in a trailer at Single-Wide. That was awesome. What was really awesome is that we got to move into it afterward. The Single-Wide staff said they didn’t want it back. Also,according to Guinness’ records, all that – marriage, reception, honeymoon, life – has never happened before all in the same place. That’s pretty neat.” – Eric “Cool FeBreze” Rogers, Hornell, NY.
Here would be the tag line “Blues people like the Blues festival, art people love Colorscape and athletic people like Gus Macker… Real people love Single-Wide.”
August 2nd, 2007 at 4:42 pm
It’s too bad that double wides wouldn’t be included—I remember years ago when I lived in the Northern part of NY—a family rented a piece of land off a neighbor of ours and parked their ‘double wide’ there. After a few years they abandon it and moved. My sister rented this piece of land, so we were able to view the ‘double wide’ before it was hauled away to where ever deceased trailers go. These people took two single wide trailers—knocked off one side on each trailer and pushed them together. It didn’t even seem to matter that one trailer was longer than the other—it just gave it an odd shape—they sealed the two trailers together with some sort of plastic and staples and because it had just turned spring and not quite warm outside there were icicles hanging inside from the plastic. The neatest thing of all was that it had two bathrooms and one bathroom had a homemade toilet seat made out of a square piece of plywood.
These creative people relocated a few miles away into another home made double wide. Unfortunately I was never able to see the creativity in their new home but they did have a planter in their front yard made out of a discarded toilet.
I hope you reconsider and allow those who make double wides from single wides come to this festival.
August 2nd, 2007 at 7:38 pm
From my senior year of high school until 2005, I had a Toyota Tacoma capable of battling the mud on any Chenango County truck trail. During that time I spent a number of lazy Saturday afternoons discovering just what some in the hills of Beaver Meadow and Smithville Flats have called home. I’ve seen the buisness end of 18-wheelers with chimneys coming through the roof, and old school buses converted to living space. I’ve never been a fan of the broad scattering of double and single-wides in our valleys, but I’ve always found a touch of humor in what passes for a residence in the hidden corners of where we call home.
August 3rd, 2007 at 7:47 am
Porchia,
My sister has often told me stories of a woman in one of the corners of Chenango County who insisted trailers were the way to go, and if you needed more space, just add on another trailer.
She had four or five stuck together at one point. It was like a trailer mansion.
August 3rd, 2007 at 8:15 am
See Jessica—that is what I mean these people are creative—the festival would be simply boring with just single wides unless there are 2 or more attached.
August 3rd, 2007 at 12:35 pm
I know some people who never clean house—just buy another cheap trailer and move into it. Wasn’t it a few years back I saw a Demolition Derby on TV consisting of vehicles pulling trailers. The one with the most trailer left won!! Maybe that’s what they should have at the fair next year.
August 6th, 2007 at 1:26 pm
I know I’m a little late on this one but I have to say that I almost fell off of my seat in laughter. I can’t believe this was allowed to be printed. Cherry Stem…Sally “Brown” McStain…Ahhhh do I miss Norwich. The humor can not be duplicated. Thanks Mike.