Celebrating the Illiterati

Jeff Genung

Regular vistors to the new and improved evesun.com have no doubt noticed the proliferation of entries in our on-line version of the ever-popular “30 Seconds.” The ease of the point-and-click interface and the comparative anonymity of the Internet have given the reader reaction line a new life on the web – “The Bride of 30 Seconds,” if you will.

When entries first started coming in on-line, I was quick to edit each for spelling, punctuation and grammar, as I do the calls to the “traditional” phone line. But as more readers discovered the on-line version, the entries came in so fast it was all I could do to hit “approve” or “deny” in a timely fashion.

Then a couple of posters started pointing out the egregious offenses being committed against the English language by our cyberspace “30 Seconds” users. And I started feeling guilty. I thought I should really take an hour or two some afternoon and get in there and clean those up.

And then I thought, why bother?

For the past dozen or so years, you loyal readers have been denied one of the sheer and perverse joys of “30 Seconds” – actually hearing the calls in their raw and unabashedly stupid form. Once in a while I’ll try to preserve the original fractured syntax in print, but it always loses something in the translation.

On evesun.com, you’re seeing “30 Seconds” completely naked – the aforementioned spelling, grammar and punctuation be damned. In any other section of this site, that would make me cringe. On the “30 Seconds” page, it seems just about right.